wow it has been quite some time since i have wrote on this. SORRY! i've been quite busy with school & honestly nothing else. I'm starting to slip back into the stage I was in when I got up here. & that's not good. I keep making up excuses for everything. Like right now I need to be studying for two tests that I have this week but this dumb computer keeps distracting me.
Kind of like God; I get going on this great streak of spending time with him but other things "get in the way." I feel like I only use God when I need him. I only cry out for him when things aren't going well, when I don't know what else to do; but I don't maintain the relationship when things are going good. I feel like he's a convenience. I always make up excuses. Oh I need to study. Oh I have to watch the world series. Oh I have to go eat now. Oh I need to check myspace & facebook. Why can't the constant reminder of spending time be in my head? Because I won't let it. I have other idols out their that I feel are more important & more satisfying than spending time with my Father who died for me. I need to change that & who more to ask for help but the person who knows all!
I got to see my mom & dad this weekend! It was fun hanging out with them & goofing around. It was weird though because when they left I didn't feel as sad as other previous hangouts with them have been. I didn't feel quite the separation shock either. I think I'm starting to settle in here. It doesn't feel like camp anymore. It feels like any other school where you go to school during the day, study & hang out at night.
GUESS WHO'S 19TH BIRTHDAY IS IN 10 DAYS?! MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
CAN YOU BELIEVE IT DAD? YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE A NINETEEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTER! YIKKESSSS....
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Settle in, love college, but please don't ever be comfortable. Do you think your parents were comfortable when they uprooted the fam and moved to WA? Do you think they were comfortable starting a church there?!?!? You have been blessed with incredible parents who have taught you about a "holy restlessness," and so know that you are right in the heart of God's plan for you when you are stretched, growing, and totally not comfortable. God will provide; it's who He is. He will always do what He says He will. Study His promises to you. He will provide friends if it's your season for friends, alternatives to partying and any other sins you face, joy for the journey, and hopefully even good grades on Psych tests to reward your efforts :) But He can't use you if you're not willing to be uncomfortable, so don't ever settle for "good enough." Use your sadness and longing as an opportunity to lean on Him. Learn how good that feels; how He will absolutely not ever let you down if you first trust Him. You know, the Promised Land looked overwhelming to most of the Israelites. But Joshua and Caleb knew it was do-able because God had given them that land. So they pressed on even when it looked impossible. I pray the Lord gives you such courage as you face your own Promised Land, the life you have ahead of you. Always go forward and take the first step of faith by trusting Him. Make that friend. Start that prayer group. Organize that study group. Go, girl, go! Blessings to you from a grateful HPCC alum.
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