faith without deeds is dead.

For some reason lately (& i don't know what that reason is just yet; if i'll even ever know) I've been thinking alot lately about what would happen if I died prematurely. Well prematurely for me; not for God. Things have been coming across my mind lately about what would happen to me when I die, would I be scared, how I would die, how people would react, I don't know it's hard to explain in writing. I've been having the urge to do something extremely out of my comfort zone because who knows how long I will be here. What I want to do I don't know. Maybe (well maybe not maybe but...) God is trying to tell me something here.

It's weird because when I was looking for pictures & banners to put on my myspace I put one on their that said something to the effect of "You never know how long someone is going to be here, so be a blessing.." I'm not sure the exact wording but it was along those lines. I'm trying to go through my feelings about this. Again, it's hard to describe in writing. All of my thoughts are in my head but I don't know how to explain them.

In my devotion the other day I decided to read the first few chapters of James where he's talking about faith, temptation, & obeying God. A verse kind of struck me: James 1:6 "but when you ask God (for wisdom), you must believe and not doubt." & that's a hard one for me. With my personality I like to be in control of situations & like to see things first hand. But with God we don't see him right there in front of us giving us wisdom & other things. We have to put our trust in him. Another verse got to me. James 2:22 (Talking about Abraham sacrificing his son) "His faith was made perfect by what he did." I have been wondering what I can do with my newly found faith. How can I show my faith to other people? Is that by mission trips, volunteering, or something else I don't know of. I've been praying about that lately; about what God wants me to do. It's just all a matter of God's timing. & I'm willing to wait it out because I know exactly how good that feels. God's pace is the best! (welll sometimes at least) :)



one last note: The other day on the Price is Right (which will never be the same again) in the "Showcase Showdown" a new record of mine was broken. A lady won her showcase & came within on $78 of the actual retail price without going over (I know I should be the new host) so she won both showcases. I have seen someone do that but this amount was the closest to the price I have ever seen! It was pretty cool.

okayyy one more last note: MY BIRTHDAY IS TWO DAYS!!! YIPPEEE! & THEN I'M GOING HOME IN THREE DAYS!! EVEN MORE YIPPEEEE!!