ELF = dad's favorite movie.

here's another video but it's got my family in it this time. hahaha

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=9623495935

:)

let it snow, let it snow, let it snow

first snow fall in bellingham! kelsey & i recorded a sweeeeet video of ourselves in it. You should totally check it out!!!

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=9623265601

:)

another lesson. many more to come.

if you try & force things on your own time, it doesn't usually work out.

i've been so worked up lately about a bunch of different things: friendships, school work, my future, & who really am I. i tried to "fix" one of them but it doesn't seem like it paid off. i forced the issue a little too early i think. (this is really hard to write about without saying certain things lol) & i realized that God put the person in my life for a reason & He has a plan for the friendship that i don't need to go mess up. again, this issue has been out of my control & it's hard to handle. i want to be the one to fix the problem. i want to be the one who figures everything out right now & right away. but i am powerless. when you & God's ideas conflict, guess who wins? yup, He does. i'm scared of what's going to happen soon with this because i don't know where it will lead. but again if God wants it to happen, he will. by faith i need to let God lead me into the right decision & have the right state of mind for it. I'm willing to accept whatever way it might lead, even though i know one will be harder than the other.

Here's another striking verse I read. It's from James 4:1-part of verse 2 "Do you know where your fights and arguments come from? They come from the selfish desires that war within you. You want things but you do not have them." This just shows how when I want one thing & fight myself and run through all of the possibilities to get it, it's just my selfish ambition taking over. I need to let God have control of the situtation.

Hebrews 11:1 "Faith means being sure of things we hope for & knowing that something is real even if we do not see it." I wish God would just be a person, i wish i could hear his voice; boy, would that be so much easier. But if we could do that, I don't think we would have as strong enough of faith as we could have if we don't see Him. He wouldn't be as accessible. God obviously (lol) knew what he was doing when he made this earth. It's hard to fathom what was running through his head when he was creating all of this. ahhhhhh it's so coool.

faith without deeds is dead.

For some reason lately (& i don't know what that reason is just yet; if i'll even ever know) I've been thinking alot lately about what would happen if I died prematurely. Well prematurely for me; not for God. Things have been coming across my mind lately about what would happen to me when I die, would I be scared, how I would die, how people would react, I don't know it's hard to explain in writing. I've been having the urge to do something extremely out of my comfort zone because who knows how long I will be here. What I want to do I don't know. Maybe (well maybe not maybe but...) God is trying to tell me something here.

It's weird because when I was looking for pictures & banners to put on my myspace I put one on their that said something to the effect of "You never know how long someone is going to be here, so be a blessing.." I'm not sure the exact wording but it was along those lines. I'm trying to go through my feelings about this. Again, it's hard to describe in writing. All of my thoughts are in my head but I don't know how to explain them.

In my devotion the other day I decided to read the first few chapters of James where he's talking about faith, temptation, & obeying God. A verse kind of struck me: James 1:6 "but when you ask God (for wisdom), you must believe and not doubt." & that's a hard one for me. With my personality I like to be in control of situations & like to see things first hand. But with God we don't see him right there in front of us giving us wisdom & other things. We have to put our trust in him. Another verse got to me. James 2:22 (Talking about Abraham sacrificing his son) "His faith was made perfect by what he did." I have been wondering what I can do with my newly found faith. How can I show my faith to other people? Is that by mission trips, volunteering, or something else I don't know of. I've been praying about that lately; about what God wants me to do. It's just all a matter of God's timing. & I'm willing to wait it out because I know exactly how good that feels. God's pace is the best! (welll sometimes at least) :)



one last note: The other day on the Price is Right (which will never be the same again) in the "Showcase Showdown" a new record of mine was broken. A lady won her showcase & came within on $78 of the actual retail price without going over (I know I should be the new host) so she won both showcases. I have seen someone do that but this amount was the closest to the price I have ever seen! It was pretty cool.

okayyy one more last note: MY BIRTHDAY IS TWO DAYS!!! YIPPEEE! & THEN I'M GOING HOME IN THREE DAYS!! EVEN MORE YIPPEEEE!!